Wedding Planner

The internet supports a man who won’t invite his gay brother to the wedding in a rainbow tuxedo

A man about to be married has been branded a ‘homophobe’ by his gay brother after he disinvited him from the wedding because of his intention to wear a rainbow tuxedo.

But, while his brother remained furious over the snub, many netizens felt the groom was justified in excluding his brother from his big day, given the circumstances.

Wedding traditions have evolved over the past few decades, with some traditions slowly dying out, to be replaced by new ones, but one adage remains true: never outshine the bride.

For celebrity wedding planner Liz Taylor, this rule holds especially true when it comes to what guests choose to wear. “Guests should never try to upstage the bride,” Taylor told the Metro. “If you are privileged enough to be invited to attend a wedding day, it is your responsibility to dress in an appropriate style and color.”

This is essentially the crux of the argument involving a Reddit user posted as Yrboiduck and his brother Sam.

Image of a man in a suit with a rainbow colored tie – a soon to be married man has disinvited his brother from his wedding due to his choice of dress.
nito100/Getty

According to the post (which has been upvoted 6,000 times, while earning more than 15,000 upvotes in its comments), the groom was looking forward to welcoming Sam and her boyfriend Jack to the wedding.

But that all changed a week before the big day, when Sam sent her a picture of what he was planning to wear. “It was a rainbow tuxedo,” the brother wrote. The rainbow flag is synonymous with the LGBTQA+ pride movement.

“At first I thought he was joking, so I said ‘lmao’. He was very hurt and told me to fuck off.” Although he said he had always been “totally okay” with anything Sam had worn in the past, he and his fiancée felt that in this case the costume was “inappropriate” and ” divert attention” from them.

More importantly, the invitation to their wedding stated that the dress code was “black and white only”. Although the groom told his brother “he could come if he didn’t wear the outfit”, Sam refused to back down.

“He said it cost a lot of money and he didn’t want it wasted because ‘I was homophobic,'” he wrote.

Angered by Sam’s refusal to back down, the groom told her that he and his boyfriend were “not invited” to the wedding. Sam fired back at his brother saying he clearly didn’t want him there because he was “homophobic”.

“I’m definitely not homophobic,” the groom wrote. “I go to pride marches and I’ve never had a problem with him being gay.”

While “most” of his family agrees with their decision, some “refuse” to come to the wedding because of the snub. Still, social media seemed to side firmly with the bride and groom.

Patjames904 wrote: “Rainbow tuxedo? Seriously? Yes that would distract the bride and you. He pulls the gay card in order to force arm you into wearing it at the wedding.”

“The problem was clothes that weren’t appropriate,” Downtown_Evidence_46 said. “The problem is not homophobia.” DirectBar7709 added, “You can’t break the dress code just because you’re gay.”

InformalGarlic2285 commented, “It’s his fault that he bought it before asking if he could wear it. You didn’t ask him to buy it, so that’s his problem. Your brother looks very dramatic,” with Marzipan-Shepherdess writing, “It’s the equivalent of wearing a long white dress to a wedding and sticking your nose out when you’re told it’s not an appropriate choice.”

“Today is your day,” Chicken_Parm_Calzone said. “When he gets married, he can wear his rainbow tuxedo. I suggest you make up with him and work something out. It’s a great day to uninvite your brother for something stupid that can easily be repaired.”

Newsweek contacted Yrboiduck for comment.

Has a marriage come between your relationship with a loved one? Let us know via [email protected]. We can seek advice from experts and your story could be published on Newsweek.